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00:00:00 uh good morning everybody just a little bit of uh housekeeping actually today I'm not supposed to preach ulam is supposed to preach but yam is sitting at the back there we thank him he was a little bit under the weather so I took over his space actually I was supposed to speak in another church today so you'll find another person missing here today which is Dr Peter so Dr Peter is speaking in the church I was supposed to speak and I speaking here so this is what happens when we are family which we
00:00:27 are really great about that uh before we start start um uh today's sermon which is really a two-parter tag team between me and ulam I'd like to introduce uh somebody very special to me she's going to come up and she's going to open the prayer for us uh she is helping us in uh our church ministry we are hoping to develop a Ministry among the Malay speaking community okay [Applause] [Music] okay for for let's see whether we can get this going if we don't have any more technical issues it looks like one more
00:03:23 time is this any I think it's yeah it's blinking a guys so you got to give me a more battery all right while we wait to shift the battery because it's blinking someone help me to do it manually can we move to the next slide okay so we're going to spend a little bit of time on it today today we're going to talk a little bit about Adam and Eve so I want to just discuss a bit about this imagine you had a friend you're trying to reach out to especially a young adult all right and uh he's a science student he's
00:03:52 a biology student a geology student and you tell him addan he tell you his nonsense um the science doesn't show it number one mankind came up from homonid all right Neal Chom magnant they evolved from the great ape and they moved out it is impossible the entire civilization came from two people one number two you Christians say the world was created in 6,000 and 10,000 years they call it the young Earth creation model and it is impossible from geological evidence somebody talk to you like that or talk
00:04:27 to your young adults like that how do you answer him the Bible says otherwise and then he say okay that's why I'm not a Christian so this is the issue we struggle with and I want to just pause five minute a little bit of this the traditional Christian approach is what you call Young Earth basically the word of God in aan you cannot take it symbolically if you do it then maybe maybe the crucifix is is symbolic so we'll take a literal interpretation of it it's a view held very often since the 1970s the problem is science nowadays is
00:05:03 much more accurate especially in geology and it's very hard to go against carbon day thing that shows you actually the stratification of the earth is millions of years any CHS I can get my clicker back thank you guys all right so I want to just take a few minutes to to show you this book this book is by a scientist called Joshua swamidass and it's a very fascinating book just a few minutes in case you need to engage in this and so Pras knows his theology he knows the image of God he knows what it
00:05:35 is what we call denovo how Adam and Eve were created from dust he understands original sin and here's one proposition in case you're interested and his following Scholars those of you who know your theology a bit like Derek kitner Peter en John Walton I have a bit of reading in this and this is the proposition which is quite interesting in his account of Genesis 1 and 2 it is in Eden which what which Genesis 1 is speaking to Genesis 2 which is really what a lot of scholar says outside of Eden the Earth as we see it is as what
00:06:11 science says it is that means there is no contradiction between evolution and the Bible the Bible is not interested in science the Bible is interested in the state of man and so there's no contradiction about dinosaurs chromagar Netherland the Jurassic world because it happens out Eden now here's what's interesting about this book he did a study the Bible he says is about genealogist he's correct is the seed of the woman science isn't interested in genealogy science is interested in genetics and DNA and do
00:06:45 you know he did a study and he put it in peer review if you study two people Adam and Eve is it possible through a scientific program run a simulation to show that the whole world was created from people and subject it to peer review he did it and it's possible and you know what's interesting when he did that review you know how many years was it 6,000 to 10,000 years exactly as the biblical account so never say that we cannot engage non-christians in things like this as we go on science tells us a
00:07:19 lot more things today I'm going to take us through uh there was just a bit of diversion we look at Kingdom and image and we're still in a family series we're going to look at covenant today which which is something ulam's going to pick up next week and we're going to look at the marriage covenant now this is a loaded topic really loaded and I I'm not an example of a very good husband I'm thankful I've been married 26 years to the best wife in the world yoan she's here she is what we call long-suffering
00:07:48 wife have to put up with me know I I I apologize I gave her covid I really need to repent of that so please go and support her a little bit all right so yes so I'm really going to go into this and uh if you want more information talk to Brandon he runs Our Family Life Ministry or marriage he's looking for counselors uh matur people let's dive into it right so I'm going to recap a little bit on the sermon on this one all humans are made in the image of God due to sin that image is corrupted meaning
00:08:19 you still carry the image but it's gone corrupted now the second one is important the purpose actually most Scholars say is a blessing or being image God that's two what we call the Dominion to rule over the world to have dominion and to multiply what we call make families and we're going to talk a bit about that now due to sin man will rule his life as his own King he will have dominion as his de fit he'll multiply as he de fit and that's why the world is such a mess but mankind is capable of great Deeds of goodness and
00:08:55 yet great evil and that's why a non-Christian can be a very good husband hband can be a very good family man don't use St men arguments against all non-christians now here's the most important thing the Gospel of John says Jesus fulfills all the writings of Moses that's exactly what he says so when Jesus is the image of God and we are being conformed daily to be more Christlike you need to understand it in terms of what is called The Creation mandate so here it is in Genesis 1 we are told that man will have dominion
00:09:29 over the Earth who has Dominion in the New Testament Jesus every FR will bow under the knee of Jesus Jesus fulfills it and one day we will rule with Jesus because we image bearers not yet but now in the now and not yet that's a hint of this and how do we rule we rule the way Jesus ruled with humility with Justice with kindness in our jobs and one day I want to take this when we look at work because this is tremendous impact on work how about multiply Jesus says anybody who follows me will have brothers and sisters and fathers and
00:10:06 mothers both in this age and the age to come Paul was Cate and that's how we understand how this mandate goes on and we're going to look at marriage in that and today we want to talk not just about married people we're going to talk to singles because the message of marriage is actually a message for the church but we're going to focus on marriage and take it to the church so let's uh go on this this is something I brought up last sermon your image of you what you think you are who you are your
00:10:40 identity affects your image of others who you think people are in relation to your identity and it affects your image of family and community that is the biblical message when you talk about image of God and what when you think about uh there we go and what we go on something went missing never mind right we go on we going to take four points but let me go back a little bit this goes into actually marriage all right let's take it a little bit all right okay what is a marriage covenant marriage covenant the image of God
00:11:16 married Covenant and Oneness and we will spend a bit of time on this very difficult issue of the painful realities of life now what is the difference between a marriage contract and a marriage covenant and and and sometimes you you you hear Christians using this language what I call a strawman argument a strawman argument is this you you often hear people say you know non-christians marriages are transactional it's like a commercial kind of arrangement that might be true but the tragedy is there are many people
00:11:48 non-christians who are very happily married how do you account for that so Christians like to use extreme examples it's almost like if you're not Christian you can't be happily married and you can't be a good husband that's completely untrue it's a very dangerous extreme dichotomy so I want to just distill it down simply to scripture before we extrapolate and say transactional is this is is is consumption a lot of sermons go out there but the simple fact is both of us all of us know you don't have to be Christian to have a great
00:12:22 marriage so what is the difference between a covenant and a contract and the simple thing is a marriage covenant is between two people by God with God and for God that's a simplest way to explain it and you see Covenant in other ways you can see it in terms of the word as generally noic Covenant abrahamic Covenant davidic Covenant is initiated by God so let's see what that means as we go on so let's look at the text today we're going to go to Genesis 2 we look at Genesis 1 the earlier text and let's
00:13:00 read from verses 15 to 20 the Lord God took the man and put him into the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it and the Lord commanded the man you're free to eat from any tree in the garden but you must not eat from the Tree of the knowledge of Good and Evil for when you eat of it you will certainly die and here's the key verse the Lord God said is not God good for a man to be alone I will make a help suitable for him now the Lord God had formed out the ground all the wild animals and all the
00:13:35 birds in the sky he brought them to the man to see what he would name them whatever the man called each living creature that was his name so the man gave names to all the livestock the birds in the sky and the wild animals now you look at verse 19 and 20 what is man doing man is doing the creation mandate in chapter one God said and it was so and here's the same thing in verses 19 to 20 man said about the animals and it was so so it shows you the image of God is taking ordering from God to bring it to the ordering of man
00:14:12 so man orders life the way God orders creation so let's pick that up a little bit to try fill it in but I want to pick up this verse it is not good for the man to be alone and and sometimes you talk to young people know I remember having a conversation with a young lady time ago and she says you know we'll have a hot to Heart thought right she says you know I I struggle to be alone I know didn't the Bible says uh not meant to be alone I want to find a partner I can't find it so here's this reality check we need
00:14:46 to find so what happens is that it leads people down a certain Trail why do people get married and I'll tell you what I think is the simple basic reason is because they think if they're alone they are lonely but here's the real reality check the reality check is you can get married and you can be very very lonely now what's important about this taxt is that it isn't man saying I'm lonely and you know what you gave me you gave me all these things around me but I'm lonely is God saying you are not
00:15:28 meant to be alone so is is is God saying you're not meant to be alone because of the loneliness factor and I suggest you the text doesn't say that but let's let's pause a little bit and and and maybe just have a bit of heart tohe heart talk about this I want you to just look around here just just look at the congregation here and if I ask you right now the percentage of women against men what would you say would you say there more women here than men I will tell you it is and if I narrow it down and I say
00:16:04 when we look at I'm really going to go into difficult territory but we would have heart to heart we look at single women especially once we hit 40s 50s 60s opposed to single men in the 40s 50s 60s what do you think is the what do you think is the percentage I will tell you it is very much more on women now this is something we don't like to talk about in church but but we have to why are there so few young men in church all you young men in ABC come here come here Kamia you are our future the seed of afbc belongs to
00:16:45 you you know statistically there's for every young lady in FB in church most churches is 2:1 ratio so for every parent who wants to see their daughter married to a good Godly Man the chances are against us so let me say this is a real issue I don't have an answer but we need to pray about this we need to really get young men back in church maybe old people like us are not very good mentors they don't want talk to Uncle Aro but I will say if we do not want to go the way of Europe when the churches are filled with
00:17:28 old people we need young man so it's important thing just to pick up all right so let me just distract a little bit on that but let me just go back to what the text means and you have to go back to the idea of not good good very good because when God says is not good in a context where he keeps saying is good good good very good he's telling you something and in Genesis 1:26 God saw all that he made and he was very good why was he very good because the image of God is male and female so when chapter 2 says is not
00:18:06 good for men to be alone the Hebrew author is trying to tie the two together is very good when it's male and female is not good when it's just male why it's got to do with the image of God that's how you try to read the text so let me just give it to you number one man and you can see by extension woman cannot effectively image God alone that's very important to pick up you can but it's not complete you and I are not meant to show God's glory solo that's the point some people say ah the image of God I need to witness for
00:18:53 God I mean I don't need FBC I'm doing it myself I'm trying to be good testimony that's not what script saying from the get go you don't do it alone that's one two what's picking him up from marriage is the purpose of marriage form the Genesis text the purpose of marriage is to image God together that's husband and wife now that's completely different from what the world is saying and it's irrelevant if non-christians have happy marriages because the purpose is now not about your happiness now Now understand
00:19:29 this we just mentioned the image of God is fulfilled by Jesus Jesus was Cate Paul was Cate so how does it mean to us who are widowed single divorced you don't have kids you come to FBC you sort of feel like you know all these all these married people sort of hang around together which is not good anyway and so the New Testament understanding of it is the purpose of church is to image God together as a multiplying Community ji Packer who was a very famous scholar says this to have dominion is Kingdom
00:20:09 Lang language and the church is to make the invisible kingdom of God visible how in the way you live as an FBC family when people see you when they come into the church they see the way we live and that Community multiplies I'm going to pick up as we go on a bit on this all right so let's go to some practical realities what's a contracted marriage you are just to me I I have a checklist on who is a going to be a good wife for me so you are just to me why because I chose you to be my wife because you have to make me happy of
00:20:53 course I'll make you happy I'll do all the usual romantic stuff I'll die for you but you make me happy P but you see in a in a covenant marriage you arejust to him you see the difference because your image bearers of God and you're contining being conformed to the image Romans 8 and you do that by being together as husband and wife reflecting God's Kingdom in our marriage and by that that's a witness now let's see how that goes through uh my image of me affects my image of others affects my image of family and
00:21:35 community in marriage what it means is this my image of me affects my image of who I want to marry affects my image of my husband and children so let me can there there was a book written by a Jesuit priest called John powerwell you can read a little bit it's fantastic the basic premise is about when you talks about image everybody here everyone here wears a mask you wear a mask because you want to project an image and you project the image because that image is what you want people to see and by that image
00:22:07 people accept you for the image you project and here is his proposition that image is a distortion so let's tell you how it works out in in in in what we call a contractor marriage I want to get married so I I go on I go on an apps okay bagel and coffee I try to find somebody I post some really nice photos of me really you know I show my apps I show my good side and all of that uh I click on I me a girl I tell these things about the girl about me but I'm very selective I'm only saying certain things because I'm going
00:22:44 fishing Ma I'm trying to catch and so what John power says I'm afraid to tell you who I am because if I tell you who I am you may not like who I am and it's all I have meaning you are going to ghost me if I tell you about my childhood trauma if I tell you actually you know I have this struggle if I have this addiction I have this issues if I come and tell you the next time I go online you're not going to be there so I'm going to project something and hopefully you will like that image I project and what happens let just say
00:23:29 you it works you do fishing you get the fish you get married then the real self comes out now what what what is what is even more worrying is that you think you're the only one doing it because the girls probably doing the same so both people come in think they know one another actually they strangers you know because they have projected the image they have minimize the bad size and push up the good size now as you go on you can see wow I I you know I like him because he's so he's so involved in
00:24:06 church after a while why is he so B one every also must do one I I like her because she's so demure and soft and kind after marriage is God gave you a mouth you know cannot use on or the person change people change and and so what he says is this there is no fixed true and real person inside of you and me because being a person necessarily implies being a person in process and this is why Romans 8 is interesting isn't it because God gave you and I a secret identity we being conformed to the image of Christ and the
00:24:51 moment two people go in and after while the Romantic goes down you often hear these things in in in in counseling right you ask one of the partners do you love him and then there will be a long pause and then it could be he or she she will say I used to love him not anymore and that's why I want a divorce and and what happens is that we forget people I'm not the same as as I was married my wife is longsuffering because I have changed I I my my mother always always says the only smart thing I did in my life was to marry my
00:25:32 wife is really because she puts up with me you know my character is a little bit you know and she she she'll gently tell me you know this is not what you should do because I need to conform but people change and once you don't get this disappointment sets in what happens that you project that to your children because the moment intimacy is removed from the spouse you need that Intimacy in your children is self serving and guess what happens you then psychologically try to keep that child to you so you show a lot of love to the
00:26:09 kid but on the same thing you say things to keep the kid close to you so the kid gets mix signals you see the kid says my my mom or dad will do anything for me but my mom and dad will say things to put me down what we call this is a toxic family now these are very painful things to say but I'll tell you it's very real and John power says human beings like plants grow in the soul acceptance not in a most feel of rejection and and we and we and we move this one step further it goes to the church and he's a Jesu
00:26:44 priest he understands Christians and he say this I also see the world of religion I see some of brothers and sisters trying to be religious without being fully human meaning without showing your scars they seem a little rigid and narrow at times wanting to to be holy project that the Purity but not human not showing their scar they seem to be winning a place in heaven the realizing enjoying the beauty in Earth they keep the Ten Commandments but the observance look so joyless such a world seems small and in air in that world is
00:27:18 still so the question you ask us is FBC like this in our relationship to one another on a Sunday morning and so this is the big biblical proposition the biblical proposition is my image of me is dual because I am made in the image of Christ but I carry my own personal image and some of my own image is sinful because it doesn't conform to Christ I need to be authentic I need to be runable I need to reveal it much harder to do in reality and so here's something no one's telling you when you go in a
00:27:51 dating app tell the the the guy hey I got all these problems sure he'll goost you tomorrow but you need to have a proc proc of being true that's the first thing and secondly the thing is qualities that attract you to the other might change it's not just men and their belly is going to get bigger not that the hair is going to all go if physically we change emotionally we change we become grumpier we become overly sensitive we become Snappy hormones come into it and that's why yes you're not the same person you
00:28:29 were when you were married because you changed and here the thing is I look at how I can image the other person to be more Christlike he is the slab of marble and you are Michelangelo she is the slab of marble and you are mangelo so both of us are slabs and marble we are both trying to calve not to be in the image you want but to the image God wants us to be that's the difference with a covenant marriage so here's one vow I saw which I thought was quite interesting it says according to the will of God my desire I
00:29:04 could be brid or Grom take you to be husband wife leaving my father mother I cleave to you the Genesis language through every year and every circumstance I will remain constant in my commitment to you and this one I really like I always hope all things and believe all things in you and for you turning your eyes constantly to him not to you you know who gave us one another you know we can we should underline the last line turning our eyes constantly to him who gave us one another so let's go to the second part
00:29:39 and we're going to come back a little bit we talk about Oneness so let's continue the story and this part is is really interesting the Lord God took the man put in Garden we had it okay uh then you're not good for man to be alone I will make a helper the Hebrew was easier suitable for him and so one want to look at the part about the what he did on the helper now the word easer here is found in Deuteronomy so here's the thing about understanding this it doesn't mean a helper is like a maid you know and and
00:30:13 sometime people like to say cliche remarks God took someone from the ribs because not from the head so they can dominate the guy not from the feet so the man can trample there's some truth in it but the word eer actually is about God God is my helper he is your shield and Helper and your glorious sword so let's continue for Adam no suitable helper was found the Lord God caused a man to fall into the deep sleep while he was sleeping he took out man's ribs and close up the place with flesh then Lord
00:30:46 God made the woman from the rib he had taken out man he brought her to the man so I I would maybe give you some uh what's the word for it some demonstration of how this happened maybe in that Garden all right so so imagine you know um this comes a bit from Rick Warren I'm I'm going to modify a bit so God says you know what Adam I'm going to put you into katos put an operation on you you're going to go to sleep when you wake up I'm going to find you you're going to see your woman and and man says Okay so
00:31:17 this probably what happen so God put man his sleep so it sleeps and then God says Adam Adam I made a helper for you Adam wake up Adam wake up oh God I was dreaming of ging Pang and Duran Adam I made a helper for you why don't you have a look give a moment God whoa he's never seen a naked woman whoa whoa whoa Whoa [Music] man and then woman was made he looked at woman and he said I'm Harry I'm big she's soft and curvatures I got this big deep voice she said hi Adam she's soft I'm rough and I'm all sweaty
00:32:29 she's so gentle and soft and then Adam says one of the most romantic things if not the most romantic things ever written in the Bible he says this the man said this is now bone of my bone Flesh of My Flesh she shall be called who man for she was taken out of man I want you to take this out God took woman out of man that is why a man leaves his father and mother is United to his wife they become one flesh and and yul's going to pick this up because Ephesians 5 quotes this verim Adam's wife were both naked they
00:33:15 felt no shame I I want you to see how romantic this is God took woman out of man then he gave woman what back to man you you see the poetry and the two became one if you really pause is tremendously romantic so you know you know young people the wedding day is the big day don't mind me saying especially for ladies women they always tell you know I dream of the wedding G so the wedding day is all the all the hopla you know the tudos the the band and all the de all the rasm and Flash and all drama but
00:33:59 we don't realize one thing there is the visible marriage vows and there is the invisible marriage vows there is the physical wedding with all the flowers and all of that and there is the invisible wedding why am I trying to tell you this because behind the offing minister there is God and Jesus picks this up in Matthew 19 he says why there are no more two but one flesh reading from the new King James version what therefore God has joined together when does this happen it happens when the couple says I do at
00:34:45 that moment you become one flesh it is God the invisible wedding just occurred and he has made you one let not man put a ther and it is the invisible wedding which counts not all the fleshy stuff and I think sometimes we forget the importance of Oneness let me maybe take a little bit on the Oneness all right we going extract a b it and Ephesians 4 picks up the same words but let me just maybe pick up a little bit about what we're trying to say with this right you see in Contract Marriage is this because what efficient is telling
00:35:28 us Paul is picking up with Christ and the church in the same way husband and wife are one Christ and the church is one now the details of it you will pick up but let me tell you what it really means in contract it's two people I would do it if you do that if you don't do it why should I do it if you're such a slob at home why should I why should I do it because it's not fair to me it's my rights and that's why my marriage breaks down but you see the Covenant marriage is this because Christ did this therefore I will
00:36:07 do it regardless if your spouse is doing his vows now you will say that's not fair but then God will say well isn't it unfair I died for your sins and you continually sin again and again I'm faithful to you Israel you continually disobey me the moment you start to keep a checklist in your marriage that's the beginning of the end because it's by Grace you have been saved and so Grace and forgiveness enters marriage so let me tell you why this is important you see your one not in unison that's why it's not Adam and
00:36:52 Steve but Adam and Eve because two men getting married or two women getting married sound the same but is Adam and Eve because it's Harmony and when Harmony all you singers know it sounds better it's Harmony that's why it's important that's one and the harmony is because one is softer and gentler another one is a brute Beauty and the bisma and because of that one is bigger one is made to lead and one is made to gently support and so so liking music you lead I follow if the guy doesn't lead in the
00:37:34 Tango the woman can't do it and boy the woman is the glory of man First Corinthians again and that's why scripture is just so beautiful and men are brutes we are not very good in details women are very empathetic men are like engine we see the big picture we don't see the small picture and so the man Paints the big picture you are my easer you fill in the details that's why you one I want to pause a little bit you see why does Jesus says what what God has put together let no man put it under because
00:38:11 it's the design for Humanity and what is happening is that the moment you have that in your mind you lock the back door in your marriage and you work out your issues let's imagine it's not like that it's contractual it's like walking on egg shelves you don't know where then you will step out line your marriage and the partner will file for divorce now of course the issues like unfaithfulness and and and domestic abuse we won't go that today but one of the most reassuring things about a Christian
00:38:43 marriage is you're stuck so to my wife Hold Your Hand you're stuck with me whether you like it or not stuck with me until till death do us part for better worse for richer or poorer in sickness and in health now if you see Christ in the church is the same thing you brothers and sisters are stuck with one another For Better or Worse in sickness and health correct you love in richness and poorest till death splits FBC apart then we will be glorified with God as husband and wife are one FBC you are one as the bride of
00:39:36 Christ that's the beauty of marriage of being Oneness God took woman back for man he gave woman back to men they become one and this is such a beautiful picture in a contract marriage is exchanging of agreements that's why they have prenuptual you do this I do this they don't tell you this but I I have a checklist then get married in a covenant marriage is an exchanging of each other to become a new Humanity uh let me tell you when your marriage is not one a few little examples okay give you three it's not
00:40:12 exhaustive one now when you say why can't you be more like uh you do that no end one okay here's another one H I hope you heard what Anna said this morning no I could have this before thank you H for your servant I hope my husband listened to it wow how do you reply your text like that sister did God say anything to you yeah I was very blessed by what you said it and I hope my my husband repents how to do here's the last one which is the best my wife needs counseling how about you no no no no not
00:40:55 me she needs counseling you say that the moment anyone says that you need counseling brother that's why they call it family therapy you know everybody's in the boat together so when you pick up this all these issues all right now I'm going to really just spend a maybe 10 15 minutes on this very painful bit all right and we're going to really talk about reality Adam his wife are both naked they felt no shame that's the last part of text now you must understand why this brought up because when you go to the
00:41:25 next chapter is ped up again and again and again but this is after the fall and what he says is after the fall they were no longer that open they were no longer uh that transparent they learn shame they learn fear they learn to hide things from God meaning they learn to hide things from each other and they learn to blame one another the woman you put here with with me verse 12 before that you darling you are Flesh of My Flesh bone of my bone next chapter the woman you put here with me you see how the contrast is so it it it shows
00:42:10 the the biblical account to show you that in reality because we live in a sinful world this is what happens in every marriage let's not beat around the bush this happens in every marriage and and the worst thing is you find there an escalation of this in fact the escalation takes you all the way to stories the Patriarchs you look carefully at the patriarch story they didn't exactly have good marriages just look at Isaac and Rebecca the most beautiful romance story and how they manipulated their kids to get what
00:42:46 they want with Rebecca siding with Jacob and Isaac say siding with Esau just as an example the patriarch stories don't show you good marriages and the classic case is David not a very functional family and from this it goes to marriage Wars because the word here desire is picked up in Genesis 4 there are two ways of reading it one a woman is emotionally tied to the husband and he will dominate her the other way is the Hebrew rendering of your desire for your husband is you are trying to control
00:43:21 your husband it doesn't matter because we all know this men like to use dominance in a marriage because because they're physically stronger they intimidate women tend to use emotional manipulation there a fact of it and you see that later you the way you see Rebecca teaching Jacob how to Corn her husband wow that's really one flesh right the Bible is full of dysfunctional marriages but here's the thing despite that God's grace is there and God uses Fallen People Like Us for his glory so if you in a space where your marriage
00:43:59 is bad or you came from a divorce and you carry shame I want to say the story of Genesis is a story of redemption you could be the unloved wife like Leah God has a story for you you could be like Isaac tricked by your own wife God has a story for you you could be like Sarah who felt lonely I couldn't have a child tried to take things in your life God has a story for you and so let's see where we go with this I want to give you this story of this man I brought him up before his name is Joshua Harris he's a bestselling
00:44:41 author at the age of 21 he wrote a book about dating then he got married he wrote a word about courtship he writes a lot of books about men and their struggles with sexual sin and he wrote his book was very good review duck down deep which is very gospel centered there's only one problem with Joshua Harris he gave up being a Christian I so this what he wrote in July 29 but all the measurements I had for defining a Christian I am not a Christian I lived in Repentance for the past several years repenting my self-righteousness my
00:45:13 fear-based approach to life the teaching of my books my view of women in church and my approach to Parenting to name a few he's now an LGBT supporter and he's an image consultant and he runs courses for people to leave their faith what we call religious trauma $280 per module from a man who used to write about men and women relationships what went wrong so let me just go through b there was a Blog written on his book duck down deep everybody was saying it's such a great book because 20110 in 2019 he say he was no longer Christian
00:45:52 the block went silent is on good risk in 202 at a pandemic somebody posted this it's kind of interesting to read this book after Harris has left in Evangelical Christianity seems it be a really interesting story you ever wrote a book about how he got to that point this book is basically a 7-hour sermon history getting serious by faith lost and loss by the death and resurrection of Jesus what this means for you George Harris is an ex-council member of the Gospel Coalition his region College you don't get more reformed than him and
00:46:21 here's where it gets bit sad I know Harris from where I was in high school youth group here to all the young adults here and the youth pastor told 14y old me the worldly part of finding a partner meaning getting married was Frau with regret if I wanted to never to get heav any regrets meaning to get married chesty and self-denial and the kind of God senters Harris described in his first best seller was all I needed meaning if I was had chesty and self-denial and kind of god- senten I will find my wife on my
00:46:52 husband I know this because I one of those kids who took notes on youth group sermons this has not been helpful in my advice my life nor you seem in haris he just feels his whole life is be a reflection embodiment Evangelical Christianity well intentioned well-meaning centered of bringing spirituality to Forefront of busy lives but Harris and here the sadness was indirectly a part of my own living the insular Joys and dreads of Christianity meaning this guy gave up being a Christian his idea was so articulate so
00:47:24 simple actionable so black and white reduction is so Wily embraced and so obviously wrong to anyone outside these belief systems and the rest of it I don't want to read you you know you know I want to just take a 10 minutes to end this you know when you go online and you read marriage sermons they'll tell you four points you do this Four Points you go have a happy marriage I I I listen to quite a few in preparing for this and they'll tell you you do this AB CDE e you get married do you really think your marriage problems
00:47:55 can be solved in the four 45 minute sermon do you really think the complexities of your marriage will be solved by reading a paperback you you know the problem I think with Harris without judging him is that the two extremes we go with marriage one is we tralize it we tralize it and you get divorced and even fancy the other thing is when we idolize it so when you write a book about dating about man meaning woman and what was the trigger for him living the faith everyone knows he got divorced and when you get divorced every
00:48:33 book you wrote about men women relationships completely holds no water all the things you tell about man you must give up this you do you might have he was the Forefront of the millennial Holiness movement you get divorced you lose your identity we are image bearers of God do not make your marriage your idol that's the Other Extreme so I'm not going to stand here to pretend that I'm going to fix your marriage that will be hypocritical so I'm going to end this in the way which I feel my conscience is saying so what we
00:49:04 going to do it we recognize marriage is about families is about the church so so let me give you a simple example as end this imagine you are here today and you are hurting for personal reason and most personal reasons family related or marriage related and I come up to you after service I say how are you brother what would you tell me would you say I'm hurting my wife did this to me can we talk no you will say fine Elder thank you correct why why supposed to be family right because you put a wall we call this a broken space because
00:49:54 I don't want you to get into my space I just come to FBC listen to song and you know Anna is almost 10 you're very Chong today you know hurry up I want to go back I'm just doing my religious Duty for today so I want to take you to a theme I brought up a few weeks ago which is a very missing theme in I think Evangelical Christianity is about space you see the the the theme of the the Bible is about really Sacred Space that's why it's Kingdom God's space is heaven our space is Earth and from the set get goal although God
00:50:30 is in heaven man is on Earth the Bible tells us there's an overlap why because God wants to walk you in a safe space and what's the first place of this it's Eden the Garden and God was saying if you stayed with me and walk with me your marriage would have worked out right but you saw the fruit you thought you were smarter you thought you could be independent you would decide what's right and wrong in your own marriage you will be your own image and you take the fall literally and what's great about this
00:51:08 model is that as we find the Garden of Eden image taken forth in the Tabernacle in again and again we don't realize edenic language is all over the Bible who fulfills it is Jesus Jesus fulfills it and we are in the image of Jesus the church fulfills it so let me go back again to this image here if I have a family problem I come to church I'm not going to open up to you guys I'm going to watch you and maybe if I stay long enough and I think FBC doesn't judge me doesn't open the Bible and just always bang the Bible in my head I see
00:51:50 that is people of different colors different race rich and poor healthy and sick Better or Worse living as Community not just after service leaving but sitting in the back and really loving one another then maybe one day maybe one day after a while I'm going to open up one of my walls and maybe on that day when I come up to you and says how are you you will tell me I'm not fine and that has happened and I've been very thankful for that and when that happens someone comes in because because we are family and
00:52:29 when someone comes in maybe you open up a wall a bit more and then maybe someone else comes in and then we soak the entire conversation with the gospel that's what it means to be one surrender remember offer I will just close with this in gospel conversations and as you go back few things if you're going through a bad point in your marriage one when feeling UNL remember God loves you he loves you so much he chose you before the creation of world the greatest love story in the Bible isn't Adam and Eve is how God loves me
00:53:17 and you for God so loved the world he gave his one and only begotten son that whoever believed in him will not perish but have everlasting life he loves you so you may feel down he loves you what happens if you're going through a personal hell well feel the marks of the cross I find it very helpful some people every waking up marriage is hell let not means words is emotional hell and if you be honest a lot of people here go through it they just don't tell you because they put up walls you could be Pastor you could be Elder
00:53:59 you could be Deacon you could be in the 30 years and smile this is important why once you feel the marks across two things happen one it puts it back to you maybe you're not image Bearer and you need to seek for forgiveness or maybe you need to give forgiveness but that's the centrality of our faith what happens when you just so long and you feel like that things is going to change B it's not just a cross it's the empty tomb and that power of dominion where every knee will bow on Jesus that power is given to you in your
00:54:35 marriage in your life to go against the principalities of Darkness that says I want to give up and for husband and wives sacrifice as Christ sacrifice submit as Christ submitted and if you look carefully at all of this you don't need to be married to practice this you can practice this with your father your mother and people in church you know last illustration when you look for go you see a lot of dirt I got this from Peter and I John go reminded me of this sometimes in marriage we just see dirt you know we see the other partner
00:55:18 we just see dirt and what God's asking you today if you're in a bad space start looking for go and maybe if you start looking more for go you dig up and you remember that first piece of gold that started your marriage the wedding ring and when you do that you remember again what Jeremiah said the Lord appeared to us in the past saying I have loved you with an everlasting love I have drawn you with unfilling kindness I want to ask the worship team to go up come up now is we prepare our heart especially if we're going through a
00:56:00 rough time and I want to ask you to maybe soak this in in a sense you and I are married to one another because together we are image bearers of Christ and I challenge you at the end of service today to make an effort to sit out there and talk to somebody you don't know and show them their family no one's asking you more than maybe give them a food say hi no one's asking you to go into profound conversations and if you did it and someone else did it maybe that wall will go down and then another wall and they
00:56:36 will say you know what when we say FBC family is not rhetoric we really mean it so I want to end with this vow and I hope we do it together I here by Covenant to love other members in the half busy family as Christ love me For Better or Worse for richer or poorer in sickness and in health to love and cherish authentically each one of us here today to death do us part not till you move to another church because we are stuck with one another according to God's holy law and will God's people say I
00:57:31 do will you Lord we just ask this very painful sermon that hits us hits me that we see through it all Lord we know your love is with us and as we sing this song through it all we remember your faithfulness to the generations Spirit speak to us in our soul that we love one another authentically and vulnerably because we are your image bearers and we are one and hurting people will see and they say yes this is family and for all those out there whose marriage is struggling speak to them with the gospel truth and the love of
00:58:17 Christ and speak to them with the community of the family of God brothers and sisters who will walk with them in Jesus name we say this amen shall We rise and we sing this song it's through it all we sang it before and I I ask As we sing it that we we do this meditatively and and and just really let the words sit in us take your time as you are forever in my life with the worship team just take me away [Music] you are forever in my life you see me through the [Music] season C with your hand and your
00:59:37 rightousness and I Look to You and I wait on you I'll sing to you Lord a hand love for your faithfulness to me I'm caring in Everlasting Arms you never let me go through it [Music] all you are for forever in my life you see me through the seasons cover me with your hands and Lead Me In Your rightousness than I look to you and I wait on you I'll sing to you Lord a hym of love for your faithfulness to me I'll carry in Everlasting Arms you never let me I'll sing to you Lord a of love for your faithfulness to
01:01:41 me how in Everlasting Arms you never let me go to the music plays as the music just continues as the as the Lord just ministers to here Lord as music just picks us through we're going to sing Hallelujah to the Lord and we're going to let the voices carry us and I want to ask you if you just hurting right now you're just in a bad space no one's asking you to put up your hand now today no one's asking you to it's it's painful but I ask that in this quietness as the music is playing Lord that God's spirit
01:02:25 heals you that through it all his faithfulness is here that God loves you maybe you feel no one loves you it is my prayer right now you wallow you swim you you immerse yourself in the love of Christ so let us sing Hallelujah let's sing it in a way that heaven heals us and God's love just so fills this Hall [Music] halelu Halu hallelujah hallelujah One Voice one more time hallelujah voices [Music] hallelu [Music] hallelujah [Music] hallelujah Hal than to Lord a he of love for his faithfulness to us
01:03:57 [Music] hallelu [Music] halelu [Music] hallelu [Music] hallelu s to you Lord a name of love for your faithfulness to me car Everlasting com you never let me [Music] go Lord God as we end right now this time of anointing this time of power this time of the holy spirit is resting on us we ask for every broken Spirit here broken heart people who put the walls around them the pandemic has been difficult that they know they rest in your Everlasting Love for God who did not who did not hold back his own son
01:05:20 because he loved us but gave him up to us as atonement for our sins what more will he give to us and we teach us we will respond in obedience in Daily fighting of sins in being true to our image of you and to love one another For Better or Worse for richer or poorer in sickness and in health till death do us part in God's holy law and all God's people say amen God bless you all and we'll continue the rest of the service
