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Uh once again it's my joy and privilege to be standing here uh sharing with you from the word of God. As uh you might be aware we have uh just begun a new series on the book of Genesis uh which will take us right up until the end of November. And two weeks ago Dr. Peter kicked off the series uh with his song of creation uh which was essentially uh about how we are made for worship. And last Sunday uh Greg Wilton came to speak on meet for stewardship.
And today is the third installment in this uh minieries within the Genesis series. And so we uh had uh we had made for uh worship uh by Dr. Peter and then made for stewardship last week. And uh today's title is uh made for relationship made for relationship with the sermon text taken from two verses uh in Genesis 1 uh verses 26 and 27 and plus the second half of u of chapter 2 from verses 18 to 25. And this is uh mostly the account of the creation of Adam and Eve, the first man and woman. And hence we'll be touching uh a lot on the relationship within a marriage uh between husband and wife. And on that note, I I want to thank Pearly uh she did a flowers and she was thoughtful enough to put their little pair of birds within the arrangement.
And in preparing this message, I did face two challenges. Not challenges from the text because uh uh they are not so difficult although a little bit deep. The first challenge is that uh my wife and I our our marriage is not is not perfect. Uh over the past 21 years, we have been trying to build a workable marriage while raising our two kids. Of course, there have been issues and challenges along the way. My wife has a lot of complaints about me, but please don't ask her to elaborate. Okay. What's wrong with him?
It is not a perfect marriage. But nonetheless, I uh we praise God that we do enjoy a relatively uh happy marriage. Happiness is uh not really a a destination that you're trying to reach, but it's uh more of the journey. The second challenge that we do have in our in our congregation many who are who are single and people who are unmarried uh due to uh because of choice or or circumstance uh and and so how do I make this uh sermon relevant relevant and beneficial to them? Although our focus is on marital relationship, we will try to extrapolate some key points uh and apply them generally to relationships within the community of God's people so that everyone uh can have something to take uh take back with them at the end including those who are single. And shall we commit this time to the Lord in prayer? Father in heaven, help us cast our eyes on you to see who you are and to appreciate how and why you did the things you did. May these verses come alive uh this morning to draw us closer to your plans. May your spirit move in our midst to stir our hearts and minds so that we may better align our lives to your will. For we pray this in Jesus name. Amen.
Early last month, my wife and I, we went on a three city trip to uh Montreal. First to Toronto, then Montreal, and finally to Otawa. It was a wonderful holiday uh that lasted almost two weeks. It was our first time to that part of uh North America. I wish I had the time to share uh some of our experiences in Canada with you. But at least let me show you a few pictures that I took uh as a forward to uh today's sermon. While we were in Montreal uh during the second leg of our trip, uh I I chance upon this pair of uh a bronze statues uh somewhere in the middle of the city. At a at a first glance, it it appears to be just a boy and a girl uh sitting on a bench. But I soon realized that this is really is actually a a contemporary rendition of the story of Adam and Eve. And how do I know that? If you look carefully, uh you can see the boy holding an apple. And if you look closer, you notice that he has already taken a bite out of the fruit. And now he's whispering to the girl to ask her to eat it as well. And her left hand, look at her left hand. Her left hand shows that she's about to take the fruit. Now, here's a quick Bible quiz. Was it Adam who first ate the fruit and gave it to Eve? Or was it the other way around?
Of course, this is a reversal or a distortion of the of the of the account as recorded for us in in Genesis chapter 3. I have no idea what the artist's intention was in in making the sculpture this way. Why the need to twist the story of Adam and Eve? Although I suspect the artist was a lady, perhaps a feminist.
As with many biblical accounts and truths, there is the original true version and there is the distorted and twisted version. Anyway, when I saw this, uh, I was also reminded that on 20th September, I have a sermon to preach on Adam and Eve, and I better start preparing what to say. While in Montreal, two days later, I came across another interesting scene. My wife and I saw this man standing in the street corner holding up a play card all by himself. The sign read, "Jesus Christ, eternal sacrifice." Now, you might think that the Canadians are are perhaps not not very good at spelling because uh the word eternal here is spelled with uh e nel instead of n a l. If you don't notice that, you better go back to school. But never mind the spelling. This message is clear that Jesus Christ is the sacrifice that enables us to gain eternal salvation. On the back of the of the sign, it was written, "I'm the bread of life." in both English and French. We later went up to this man and we had a nice long chat with him. His name is Chris Messia. And all he wanted to do was to was to tell passers by about Jesus. I was really encouraged by his zeal uh for the gospel. Although his method, I must say, is a little bit unusual. But I did see him engaging in conversations with people who came up to him to ask him questions. And since I got home, Chris and I, we have been exchanging some emails. Now, in contrast to this, let me show you one last photo. This was taken in Toronto a few days before I met uh Chris. Here we have also in the street corner a group of adherence of another faith distributing free books and literature about their religion and they also showed a lot of zeal in what they were doing but in this case I didn't go up to talk to them so in two different cities over a span of a few days I I I saw two differing or even opposing approaches to God as represented by this and the picture before this both cannot be true at the same time because each one says that the other one is false. So when it comes to the issue of salvation also there is the right way and there is the distorted way or in fact many distorted ways. The reason why I started the sermon this way is to illustrate how when it comes to marital relationship or even any human relationships, there is the biblical way and it is also the world's way. Both cannot be true at the same time because they are based on fundamentally opposing ideas. In studying today's text from Genesis 1 and 2, we are going to look at how God ordained the institution of marriage and how it's supposed to work as opposed to what the world makes it out to be. I propose that uh we work through our our text this morning by examining uh two questions. One, how are we made for relationship from the vantage point of scripture? and two, how are we to conduct our relationship the way God intends us to do? Along the way, we will also discuss various distortions of the biblical model for marriage and relationship. And towards the end, I hope to find time to share perhaps some experience my own marriage with my wife. Firstly, how are we made for relationship? We shall start by looking at the opening verse uh of our text uh the first part of uh Genesis 1 26. Then God said let us make mankind in our image in our likeness. The fascinating thing here is the use of the plural pronoun us. God is speaking here and he says let us in plural let us make man in our image in our likeness and here we see uh another plural pronoun our used once used not once but twice now many of you know this uh and you have been told that this points to the the idea of the trinity the father son and spirit are speaking to each other and that's why us and power are used. Well, it's not exactly wrong to think that way. And many Christians, including me, hold the view that this this uh verse does reflect the concept of the Trinity. But I'm going to disappoint some of you by pointing out by pointing out that this verse may but not necessarily point to the Trinity. In other words, it is not a conclusive evidence for the Trinity in the Old Testament. If you ask an Orthodox Jew about this verse, he will firmly say there is no hint of the trinity in this verse. And here, let me digress uh a bit for the sake of Bible knowledge. In the Hebrew Bible that the Jews have, which is the same exactly the same as our Old Testament, God's name is always mentioned using one of three words. The first is which is which is a generic uh word for for God and is translated in English as G O D God with capital G of course. The second word Adon is translated as Lord of course with the capital L and this is more like a title. The third one which is a little bit complicated is a combination of four consonants Y H W H. And of course it's uh written with the Hebrew letters. This is just a transcription of the Hebrew letters. I think it's y uh hey w and hey. Now this is the personal name of God which we sometimes uh read as Yahweh or the derivative Jehovah but not so with the Jews to the Jews because Y HW is is the personal name of God. It is also regarded to be too sacred to be pronounced. So whenever a Jew reading the Hebrew Bible come ac come come across this this Y uh Y HWH he will not dare to say it out loud instead he will read it as Adon and that's why you cannot find the word Yahweh or Jehovah in some of your English Bibles because Y HWH is translated as Lord in which all four letters uh LB are capitalized. is and you see this all over uh Genesis chapter 2 including in our text verses 18 19 21 and 22 u here. Now I don't want to dwell uh too uh too long on this but I just want I just want to point out that both Elohim and Adon the first two are words in the plural. Now this may come as a surprise to you. So, does it mean that that the Jews worship many gods since they don't believe in the Trinity? Well, we will see. Strictly speaking, because Elohim and and Adon are plural, strictly speaking, they should be translated in English as gods and lords with ses. But you don't find that in the English Bible because we have only God and Lord always in the singular because we worship one God not many gods. Deuteronomy 6:4 says here O Israel the Lord our God the Lord is one. And so the Jew so do the Jews they also worship one God. How so? You see the word Elohim appear appears all over the Old Testament in Genesis 1 alone in our text today uh it appears 30 times and whenever a verb accompanies Elohim we find that it's always in singular form in Hebrew when a when the way a verb is spelled can tell you whether it's singular or uh plural unlike English and in in in and when and all verbs that accompanies the word Elohim are always in the singular. For example, here in verse uh here in verse 27. So God created mankind. God in this verse is of course the word Elohim while created comes from the Hebrew word barah which is singular in form. And also notice the singular pronouns uh his or he in this verse because the lord the uh the lord is one singular. So although and adon are plural in form they are singular in its substance or sense. You may ask why then are these words written in plural when all the verbs are singular. It has got has got nothing to do with quantity. They are made plural in order to magnify the attributes of God to amplify his greatness so to say or to make a plural of his of his might or of his majesty. Now uh this so coming back but this concept is some something we don't see in the English language. And coming back to our Genesis uh uh the opening verse verse 26 uh here the plural pronoun us and or our can therefore be seen as an extension or coming from the plural form of the word Elohim. I'm sorry if this gets a bit too technical. I'm elaborating this so that when you when you when you come across the word God or Lord or or its uh corresponding pronouns you you can understand what it means in the text. Now coming back to our topic and still on this verse 26, I will now draw your attention to an interesting contrast between this verse and the rest of uh uh chapter one. Now throughout the creation account in chapter one, whenever God created something, he would say let there be light in verse three or let there be be a void between the waters in in verse six. Or he would say, "Let the land produce vegetation in verse 11." Or, "Let the water team with the living creatures in verse 20." And this is how it sounds like for the most part of chapter one until you come to verse 26. Here, God could have could have just said, "Let there be mankind." Or he could have just said, "Uh uh uh, let the dust of the earth give forth man." Instead, what did God say in verse 26? He said, "Let us create mankind." The difference in the style of language is telling. With every other thing that he created, God just had to say, "Let there be this or let there be that." But when he created Adam and Eve, he said it differently. Let us create mankind. And how should we understand this? As I mentioned earlier, I subscribe to the view that verse 26 does reflect the concept of the trinity notwithstanding the grammar in the original Hebrew text. Now, we don't have time to discuss the complex topic of the trinity. Anyway, briefly, we believe in the triune God, one God, singular, but consisting of three persons, the father, son, and holy spirit. In fact, the word person is not a very very good choice of word because non-believers may may may may read it as may see it as three persons, therefore three gods. But I can I can't think of a better word. If you say three components, it sounds a bit too impersonal. In any case, based on this, you can imagine how father, son, and spirit had been in an intimate uh and close relationship throughout eternity past. Even before Genesis 1, they have all the time been together. And I want you to try to picture a close fellowship and community within the triune God. Our triune God is thus a community in which father, son, and holy spirit enjoy each other so deeply. So much so that when we read verse 26, we could almost hear God saying because we enjoyed this community so much until now, now let us make let us create mankind so that they too can enjoy uh uh each other and they too can be a community. And that is the picture I get from verse 26. The point I'm making is that verse 26 here suggests that man uh human beings are hardwired to be a community. We are made for relationship. It's in our DNA. And that's why it's sometimes said that no man is an island. We are made to connect with one another. Loneliness is a terrible feeling. But to be sure, loneliness is not the same as being alone. You can be alone and yet not feel lonely. You may be alone, but I hope you're not lonely. FBC is a place where you shouldn't feel lonely because we are a community as God intends us to be. Now, to drive home this point further, when verse uh verses 26 and 27 say that we are created in the image or or likeness of God, it says here four times. It means not only are we not only not only do we inherit his faculties to to reason and to feel and to will but we also we also given the capacities for for morality for spirituality and for community. And this is spotted by by chapter 1 verse 28 which is outside our text today where God said to Adam and Eve be fruitful and increase in number. In other words to make a family because the family is also a community and families are the building blocks of the larger community which we sometimes call society. And speaking of families as building blocks of the community, I see a growing distortion in modern society where super busy young people are delaying marriage or choosing not to get married at all. Perhaps they are very busy with our work. Perhaps they are afraid of being hurt or afraid of commitments. And when they do get married, sometimes they decide not to have children. And when they do have kids, often it's just one. Statistics shows that in 1960, 72% of adults in America were married. 72% were married. But by 2008, this has dropped to only 50%. And this is the actual graph showing a clear downwards trend. Do you see the concern here? So to the young people in this congregation, my advice is this. Please go and fall in love and get married. What's so difficult about that? Then go forth and multiply and live happily ever after. Now, I don't want to sound like your your mother nagging you, but what I'm saying is biblical in the spirit of our text today from Genesis 1 and2. Because we are made for relationship by a God who is a community. On that note, where is Nasimo? I was wondering when he's going to pass me an imitation card or is downstairs. I always remind him where's the cut. He says no partner. You have to have a cut.
Now just a little bit more and we will move on to the second part of the sermon uh to address how we are to conduct our relationships. We are still dealing with the question of how we are made for relationship. Here I want to pick up another interesting verse from our text uh from um uh in support of today's topic uh this verse verse 18 from chapter 2 that says the Lord God said it is not good for man to be alone. God said that it is not good for Adam to be alone. Now amazing thing is that throughout Genesis 1 whenever God created something the writer would write and God saw that it was good and five times at least we find that phrase uh in Genesis 1 everything was good but after he created the first man he himself said it is no good. So what is happening here? Did God make a mistake? Was there a design flaw or did he miss something? We know that cannot be the case because God doesn't make mistakes. His plans are perfect. Maybe it's our mis maybe it is our mistake to read this verse too simply. Now earlier we've already discussed how we worship a triune God, a God of community. That very nature of God as a God of community necessitated the creation of Eve after he created Adam. The creation of the woman was surely not an afterthought or to nor to correct a mistake. It was rather a wellthought complimentary step after the creation of the man. Thus, when we read verse 18 here where God has said it was no good for men for Adam to be alone, don't read as if God had second thoughts. This verse may be paraphrased to mean that God has was not finished with his work of creation after he made the man. He had one last thing to do. That is to make Adam a companion, the woman. You see, Adam was not complete without Eve. Something was missing in his life. And that's why God would do something to make that complete. And there's a joke that goes like this, that a man is not complete until he finds his mate. And we when he when and when he does find one, he's finished. I hope that's not the case with your with your marriage.
But here it was when Adam had Eve that God finished finally finished his work of creation. Now here you may ask if if Eve is a com is if the creation of Eve is a complimentary step after Adam, why didn't God create both of them at the same time? Wouldn't that be more efficient? Now there is a time gap between the creation of Adam and Eve. We don't know how long at most at most 12 hours I think uh because if you consider the creation day as one literal day then Adam made the morning and Eve in the evening. Now through the through the lens of today's topic I will I will offer you two reasons why God created Adam and Eve separately and not at the same time. He created first the women, first the men and then the women. Eve was not created from the dust of the earth like Adam but was but was she was formed from one of his ribs as described in verses 21 and 22 here. The first reason is so that all husbands each of them can tell his wife you are the bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. which Adam actually said to Eve in verse 23. In other words, you are an inseparable part of me. Or to put it more romantically, baby, I need you. You know, I can't live without you. You know, something like that. I know that sounds, I'm sure, more romantic, you know, in the years of your wife. Don't go and tell her you are the bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.
Now for the second reason why Adam and Eve were created separately, we note that between the time God created them, he brought the animals to Adam so that Adam could name them. Now this is described in the here in verses 19 and 20. Now this begs the question why this naming exercise before the the creation of Eve. you know, he made Adam, then he brought all the animals to Adam to to know asked Adam to name them, you know, and then he created Eve. Why didn't God create Eve immediately after he created Adam, take a rip from his uh body? The answer is in the second part of verse uh 20. But for Adam, no suitable helper was found. Which seems to say that at the end of the naming exercise, among all the animals that stood before Adam, not one of them was deemed suitable or right for him. Sometimes when we read the Bible, we must read it a bit more figuratively. How do we read this verse? It is not to say that God was hoping that Adam will find Adam might find a dog or a cat, you know, to be his companion. That doesn't make sense. Rather, this is a more of a poetic way of saying that God was going to create someone really special for Adam. A creature that would be unlike any that he has created so far. A fitting companion, a life partner, a custommade individual whom Adam could relate to intimately. And in accordance to God's nature as a God of community, uh uh uh Adam was created to give uh Eve was created Adam to give Eve was created to give Adam a someone with whom he he could have a close relationship with someone that he could cherish and love and someone who would love him back. I know some of you have pets at home, perhaps a dog or a cat. And I'm sure you love your pet. There's someone I know who is reluctant to travel over because she cannot bear to leave the the the the her dog with the with the with the neighbor or even in a pet hotel. Now, loving your pet is one thing, but to say that your cat or dog loves you in return is I think stretching it a bit. you know, I think it's more accurate to say that your dog or cat is very attached to you because you feed it and care for it, you know. So, we we must remember that Eve was created with the capacity like Adam to love. In any case, I don't want to comment too much on this pets because we we don't have pets at home. My wife is terrified of cats and dogs. But speaking of love, which human beings are capable of but no animal, it is useful to note that because the triune God is community, he is also relational and he understands relationship. And because God is relational, he stands to reason that God is a God of love. Since love is the foundation of all biblical relationships, love is therefore a basic attribute of God. Imagine if God is not a triune God. How then can he understand love? If it's all alone from eternity past to eternity future. This is important because the concept of a triune god of the trinity, a god of community allows us to understand that he is also a god of love. In other monotheistic religions which I shall not name that rejects uh the trinity, it would be hard for them to say that God is love. If you recall what happened at the baptism of Jesus as recorded in the gospel, God the father spoke through a voice in heaven and he said, "This is my son whom I love." And what this means is that we are not only are we made uh for relationship, we also made to love. Love is hardwired in us because we are made in the image of God. And uh it's very natural because relationship and love go hand in hand. What this also means is that we when we love the other person in the relationship, we place his or her interest above our own. We want the best for him or her. Now, if you want a more detailed uh understanding of of love, you should read 1 Corinthians 13. But here is biblical love in a nutshell. I'm giving to you. Placing the other person's interest above your own. It is also described as sacrificial love. Now, in a common distortion of this of the relationship that God intends us to enjoy, many people get into relationship with a mind to benefit from it. It's not about how much they can give to the relationship, but how much they can get from the relationship. They will stay in the relationship as long as they can get what they want and they will leave the relationship when they can no longer get what they want. And that's why we see a 60-year-old husband leaving his wife of 30 years for a younger woman because she can no longer give him so-called satisfaction. And therefore, we see a wife leaving uh her husband when she when he has financial troubles because he can no longer give her security. It's all about me. And this poster sums this up very neatly. It says to cut out the M, turn it upside down so that me become we. In a biblical relationship, it is not about me, it is about us. A biblical relationship will not work if you consider yourself more important than the other party if you think that your needs are greater than the other person's needs. In a biblical relationship is about what you can give, not what you can get because you place the other person's interest higher than your own. In fact, we should also apply this not only to a to relationship within a marriage, but also the way we relate to each other in this church, the community of God's people. Now, we have covered the the first part of the sermon, how we are made for relationship, which is the major part. And uh now we're ready to discuss the second question. How are we to conduct our relationship? First the theory, now the practical. From here I would like to focus more on marital relationship. Those who are single and have decided to remain single, please bear with me. Those who are single and uh but planning to get married, please listen carefully. What are the keys to make a marriage work? Well, now I'm going to draw from the text and I'm going to draw three points from the text. The first is from verse uh 24 chapter 2. That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife and they become one flesh. Now our focus is on the phrase they become one flesh. But what does this mean? How can it be? I mean my wife and I, we are two separate individuals. How can we be one flesh? Some people think that this phrase has a sexual connotation, something to do with sex, but let's not go there. This sermon is rated PG-13 or lower.
Now first of all as I explained earlier God intentionally made Eve after he created Adam and he made Eve with a part taken from Adam so that both husband and wife can look at each other and consider the union to be inseparable which I said earlier because if you lose a part of your body you will not function well or you may even die and that's what is mean what is what it means by uh by they become one flesh. And that's why because of this inseparable in inseparable nature of the union Jesus says in Matthew uh 196 and Mark 10:9 what therefore God had joined together let not men put aunder or let no man separate and that's why for the Christian divorce is seldom uh an option uh we stick with our partner uh through thick or thin uh for better or for worse unless of course the divorce is force upon you because unlike uh the in the days of old the law today gives uh uh gives the right equally to both men and women to walk out of the marriage and the process has been made so simple and has even become an industry. Now in addition, not only does the phrase they become one flesh carry the idea of being inseparable, it can also be taken to suggest oneness or unity in various aspects. And one translation of this verse verse 24 that I came across goes like this. And the two of them become like one person. Okay, that that's clearer. Okay, that's like modern English. If you're one person, you cannot go in two different directions. You cannot subscribe to two different sets of values. You cannot follow two different faiths. That's why the phrase they become one flesh can also convey the idea of oneness in direction, oneness in destination, oneness in purpose etc. To me it should be as a Christian it should be oneness in the in in the spiritual foundation. A Christian couple must anchor their marriage on God who has brought them together and both of them to be bounded bonded in the in the in the love of God. We must bear in mind that when Adam and Eve were they were in the Garden of Eden, they were not alone. Genesis, there's one very peculiar verse in Genesis 3:8 that describes God walking in the garden in the cool of the day. The picture we get is both of them in close fellowship with their creator. is a picture of a perfect relationship. A Christian couple must always put God in the center of their their marriage. And this is an important key in how we should conduct our marital relationship. Now to illustrate this, a Christian marriage is is not supposed to be like this where husband and wife are on two separate bicycles which can go in two different directions. Rather it should be more like this. Both of them riding one bicycle going in one direction and notice that both of them are pedaling together at the same time because they're working on the marriage together but not like this where only the man is pedaling. No wonder she's greening. No, the wife should not be just a passenger because years later she may not be so happy when her husband rides away leaving her with the two kids.
Now seriously, a common distortion of this oneness that a Christian is supposed a Christian couple is supposed to find in God is when they start to anchor their relationship on something else other than God. For example, if both spouses are so preoccupied with the with raising the kids, if they're too focused on parenting, what happens is that one day when the kids when the children leave the nest, the marriage will start to have cracks and may fall apart. On the other hand, anchoring your marriage on God in ensures that both of you are always on solid ground. any other reason may not be for too long.
There is another common distortion relating to this verse 24. As I said there now one translation has it as and the two of them become like one person. Two become like one. And notice it says two and not three. It will not work if you do not follow this formula. God's design for a marriage is two only two. There is no room for three. You can try but it will soon fall apart and people will get hurt. In any case, having one wife is already complicated enough. I don't I don't know why you want to torture yourself by trying to have more than one.
And then there are religions that allow a man to have up to four wives. Wow. I just can't see how it's going to work. And here's a funny quote that I found on the internet that says it all. A relationship is only for two people. They are just those who don't know how to count.
Now moving moving on to the next key, the second key on how to conduct a relationship in a marriage. Let me point you to the second part of verse 27. Chapter 1 verse 27. He says, "In the image of God, he created them male and he created them male and female. He created them. It's so clear. God created them male and female. Did God create them male and male? No. Did God create them female and female? No. God made a man and a woman. A very disturbing distortion to this in recent years is the growing tolerance for same-sex marriage, especially in the West led by America. On 20th on 26th June this year, the US Supreme Court made a ruling that samesex marriage will be legal in all 50 states throughout the country. And there were thousands of gay supporters outside the courthouse that day celebrating that decision. This is an act of utter defiance against God Almighty. is like telling God, pointing a finger in God saying we are going to do the very thing that you detest. And what is more worrying is that the Supreme Court ruling is is not just the the the opinion of of that nine justices. It actually reflected the thinking of the majority of Americans. In 1996, close to 70% of Americans were against same-sex marriage with only about 25% in favor. Last year, only 37 were against and 53% the majority were in favor. This is surely a sign of end times. and make most and make make no mistakes that this will spread even though Asian societies are still considered conservative. Our young people are going to be influenced by this. But let us not dwell on let us not dwell on this too much. We can discuss this uh uh you know after after the service. But what is the second key to a marital relationship from verse 27 here? Male and female he created them. Earlier I asked did God created them male and uh male and male? The answer is no. But why not? Why not? Let's dwell on this a bit on this very strange question. If Adam needed a companion, why not make another man? You mean you didn't think about it, right? If you walk into any pub, you will see the man having a gala time talking about shallow things like like football. Sorry, no fencemen to football fans. But it looks like men, they can relate very well to each other. But some of you will be very quick to answer, oh, God made uh Eve or Adam for the purpose of reproduction. You need a man and a woman to make a baby. But if you know your biology, there are organisms in God's creation that are unisex, technically known as hermaphrodites and they can they can reproduce by themselves without a mate. So it seems that the primary purpose of creating them male and female is not necessarily something biological related to biology of course but not necessarily biological. The right answer is that God didn't create another Adam. God created Eve in order that Eve can complement Adam. So that Eve can compliment Adam. Hey, here compliment is PL, not PL I. Okay, don't go ask your wife to keep complimenting you, praising you. You're so you're so uh handsome. You're so strong. P L E M N T, not PL I. Although I've made it a habit to compliment my wife as often as I can. Wow. you you know today you look like you're 30 years old.
When a compliment is far from reality is called an exaggeration.
Okay. When when two persons are in a complimentary relationship, it means that each has his or her own set of strengths and we w weaknesses. And where one is weak, it is compensated by the other uh person's strength. And this is exactly uh this is exactly the meaning of the word helper in verses 18 and 20. Helper here is when one is weak but the other is strong. You don't help someone who is already strong. When I help my children with mathematics because I'm good in mathematics, they're weak. That is the biblical meaning of help. But some many of people read this as domestic help.
But I must confess I'm a bit guilty of that as well. To illustrate this, it's not like when the husband is fixing the light and he needs his wife to help him. No, when the wife is cooking and she needs a husband to help her. brother is more like she doesn't know how to fix a light and the husband would do it. He doesn't know how to cook and the wife will do it. But please don't get me wrong. I'm not suggesting that men shouldn't help around in the kitchen. So when we say that husband and wives are supposed to be to be complimentary. It means to support each other, okay? To to to nourish each other and to strengthen each other. If you think about it, when God created Eve, he made someone totally different with different temperament with different way of thinking and different way of doing things. So that when Eve was presented to Adam, she must have been such a mystery to him very different and but such is the wisdom of God's design that these two who are different would come together to become one to form a beautiful oneness so that each will be complete in the union with each other. If you recognize that God created them male and female different but complimentary only then can you build a stable and happy marriage. And this is the second key. The husband shouldn't act like a wife nor the wife like a husband. The roles of the husband and wife are different and very clear. So don't reverse or distort these roles. Some women they like to behave like men.
Some wives they are simply too bossy over their husbands at home and also in public. No, you should let your husband take the lead, which is biblical. And then there are some men who who who likes to behave like women. Some men, some husbands are too weak and they refuse to take the lead. It will be disastrous. It won't work in a marital relationship based on God's design. Don't distort what God has designed. Now, let's move quickly uh to the third and last key uh to how we should conduct relationship. And I draw attention to the last verse of our text, the very end. Uh verse 25. Adam and E and his wife were both naked and they felt no shame. Now this is the last last key. Of course, they were physically naked because this was before the fall before they sinned. But I'm not going to talk about this in detail because remember this is PG-13. Okay. But there is a second I want to I want to draw your attention to a second uh layer of meaning. uh be behind this verse it it it means that they were completely transparent to each other. There was nothing to hide and the point this point is quite quite straightforward easy to understand. The therefore the third key to a happy marriage from our text is therefore honesty, transparency, sincerity, not deceit, pretends and lies. And there's no need for me to dwell on this too much because it's such an obvious point, such an obvious key to marital success. As a matter of fact, this can also be applied to how we should relate to each other in the church in the community of believers. Now to conclude uh today's sermon uh come to the end um I would like to offer a piece uh practical piece of advice uh in relation to relationships and I shall share this from my experience uh being married to my wife for the past 21 years. Even though I said at the beginning our marriage is not perfect, but some of you have been married far longer and really are more qualified to talk about this than me. This advice is for for those who are married in particular, also for for those who are who plans to get married one day. But it's also for for everyone in general because it can also be applied to govern relationships within the community of FBC. But let me say it from from the angle of of marriage. The advice is this. You can never find or marry Mr. Wright or Miss Wright. Mr. Wright and Miss Wright, they don't exist. They exist only in Barbara Cutland's romance novels because the harsh reality, this is very important because we expect him to be Mr. Right or her to be Mr. Right. The harsh reality is that each of us brings into the relationship his or her own sets of flaws and shortcomings. There is no exception to this. Your Mr. Right or the one you think is Mr. Right will turn out to be Mr. Wrong. What we then try to do is to change the person into someone whom we find more ideal or at least more acceptable or we we conveniently forget that we too need to change as well. This is again the me mentality is about meeting my needs meeting my criteria and so that he has to change or she has to change not me. Well, if you can try to insist that your spouse change his or her ways, but don't expect too much result. Generally, it's very hard for a person to change, especially uh when we get older. A marriage works better when both sides accept each other as he or she is. I have many flaws of my own. As I remarked at the beginning, my wife has many complaints about me. But I'm thankful that she usually doesn't make a fast or an issue out of them. Now to illustrate this, my wife sometimes or often in fact every day reminds me to take out the rubbish which I normally do. But this is the truth. You can check with her. I'm the rubbish thrower. But once in a while when I'm busy or I feel lazy, I'll pretend not to hear her from upstairs. She may remind me again and again. But after one or two hours, if she sees that it is not yet done, she will do it herself without a fuss. She will never get upset over such a thing. But once in the blue moon, she may come up to complain. Why you like that? Why you don't help? You know, I will listen to her speak for a while. Oh, you must listen. You know, let her air her frustration.
And then at the right time I will skillfully change the subject
and all will be forgiven.
You may laugh but my point is this. My my wife usually doesn't make a big fast over my many failures and incompetence and vice versa. But that doesn't mean that we paper over all our flaws. It's just that we prefer to dwell on positives rather than negatives. And bearing in mind also that each of us is continually being transformed by the working of the spirit in our lives. A process that is taking a long time. It will take a lifetime. If the Holy Spirit takes a lifetime to transform a person, what makes you think that you can change your husband's character in 5 years or 10 years or even 20 years? So, so let this be one more key to to success in relationship that we're willing to accept each other's weaknesses and faults. Remembering always that we too have our own or even more. Let us apply this to relationships within marriages and also relationships within the community of God's people. And finally, one quick word to those who are single, to many of our sisters who are single in our midst. uh many of our sisters in Christ who live alone. I need to address this in the uh at the end. Is your life less fulfilled because you're not married because you don't have a husband? Is it less fulfilling? I should think not. Yes. During the time of the Old Testament, the prevalent culture was was that women were expected to get married and to bear children. But when Jesus came, he opened a whole new chapter in the area of relationship. Why do I say that? Because his death on the cross enabled us to be reconciled with God, which in turn gave us the opportunity to have an intimate relationship with God, plus all the other wonderful relationships with so many in the community of God's people. But it wasn't possible before Jesus came. So your singlehood may in fact allow you to develop an even deeper relationship with God than is possible with me. In your solitude, you you you may have a chance to enjoy God's presence even more more than those who are married. At the same time, your your singlehood may prompt you to pursue even closer relationships with so many others in the community of believers because you have fewer distractions, so to say. And this is my encouragement to you that you enjoy all these relationships to the full. Shall we close in prayer?
Our father in heaven, it's truly amazing to see how we are made in your image. how we are made for relationship, relationship with you, relationship with our spouse and relationship with others. Help us to conduct and enjoy this relationship the way you design and ordain it so that we can delight in the wonder of you, the wonder of our loved ones, and the wonder of our brethrens. For this we pray in Jesus' name. Amen.
