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00:00:01 okay finally all right um next week I'm speaking again uh people are very Chong I given two slots cuz anything they go they can spill over to the next week John le will talk about materialism and Ryan Townson will speak the week after that okay let's start um this is a buzzword is is almost cliche all right I would just say that in love that means it's very popular in what we call conservative Evangelical circles to say you're gospel centered you know and you hear it in the preaching in the end of
00:00:38 every sermon they'll stick the cross in there one even if the text doesn't say they'll stick the cross in there so what exactly do you mean when you say you are gospel centered all right and I want to really take this through two Saturdays ago the elders and the deacons met up together to try to flesh this out you know what does it mean to be Gospel Center do you really need to be go gospel centered now let me just start off by saying something churches V uh there variety of Christian churches and they all have what we call
00:01:11 what I will call identity markers meaning key things that identify themselves this is a little bit of a sweeping statement a little bit maybe you may not agree with it but I'm going to list down what I would call the main identity markers of a lot of people call theel Christians for for example if you're Catholic you will say you're the one true church I I started an interd group I have a very strong Catholic with me all right one of my friend was from Calvary Church he became an orthodox priest all right a tempus crusade for
00:01:45 Christ in the 7s the key people moved to become Orthodox a charismatics how do you define a charismatic speaking in tongues you meet someone from the Seventh Day Adventist they call say SDA Sabbath is Saturday morning to to Dawn strict observance and something came up last years called a Torah observers and some of us know some people there we have close people in there and they believe that the Old Testament Feast carry on today you must not eat pork I come from closed Brethren as opposed to open
00:02:20 Brethren closed Brethren all the women will you know whole communion every Sunday and and one of my closest friend is a leader in the non denominational Church of cry they call theel COC and in COC Doctrine baptism is essential and a local church movement you may not have heard of them they they have a building next to the H uh what we call the the council churches in Jalan gassing you know Jalan Jalan University next to the H Hospital you know how you meet a guy from the local church movement you ask you what church you
00:02:54 from he say I'm from the church in Petaling Jaa it's true there're an offshoot from Washman KN Watchman KN was one of the most famous Chinese M uh uh Christians his follower was a man called witness Le and they started a movement in Taiwan and to them churches must be the church in Sydney the church in patal jaaya the church in EO you cannot call yourself Baptist Church you know and there is the true J Church my Engineers mentioned of them and they're very big in East Malaysia so Christians allow find
00:03:30 themselves to all sorts of teachings and how do you know who is right maybe I ticket another angle right and spinning out the way and why we want to look at what it means to be gospel centered this is an iburg model used very often in counseling since it's a family life sermon meaning all of you is what we see on the surface but beneath the water that's what drives you you come to church you say hallelujah how are you but beneath there what LS that defines you as a person this is actually what you call freuden psychology but
00:04:08 Christians have adapted it and underneath the water two things drives you the first thing is your beliefs and the beliefs structures your life it comes out in your behavior now there was a very famous book on this called emotionally healthy spirituality Peter Kazo and he picked this up and this B basically maybe how I would call gospel centeredness and we will pick it in today's message how does the cross Jesus dying for you for your sins him being your lord and savior for all of us in this church redeeming a new
00:04:49 Humanity matter when you go through depression when you're anxious when you don't have money when your marriage falls down when people hurt you and stab you in the back suddenly all the doctrines you have doesn't matter whether you're SDA Church of Christ charismatic Lutheran whatever you call it all of these goes out the window and we want to see how real it is so today we'll look at how the gospel shapes are relationship and we're going to look at it in two parts today something very dear to me which I think
00:05:21 the last few months has come out the idea of headship and submission generically yeah and next week we look at something quite missing when we talk about love there are two components to love you know love and respect we very often talk about love we very seldom in fact I can't remember the last night we spoke about respect and I I look through the text is actually a pair so let's come before God In Prayer Lord we ask that I come in humility I come in teachability I come with the power of the holy spirit that I disappear and you
00:05:58 manifest yourself so strong this morning that your presence just takes over this whole place and people will say ah Lord God you are in our midst in Jesus name we say this amen we're going to continue the bit from what we spoke last time and we talk about time be careful then how you live not as unwise but wise and few people spoke to me I want to just stress this again what the devil does he puts you in a vicious circle right those of you didn't listen maybe pick up the the the sermon I give you example since we're talking about
00:06:35 family life and issues you get upset you get depressed you go through a difficult time you tend to ruminate you think about it you think about it you go to bit you worry and because you worry you need to comfort yourself you go to social media to comfort yourself you play games you do this and it puts you in a circle you need to medicate medicate to do the pain medicate do the pain and then you go through life meaninglessly and the cycle continues so I want you to pick this up now in that context Paul talks about the
00:07:13 Holy Spirit we pick up Verse 18 do not get drunk of wine which leads to De bouty instead be filled with the spirit now verse 19 is interesting because he takes it in a corporate manner speaking not to God you know but to one another when you sing you're singing to one another with Psalms hymn songs and how do you sing you sing to one another make music from your heart to the Lord there's that horizontal and that vertical and always giving thanks to God the Father for everything in the name of Lord Jesus Christ the second thing we
00:07:47 picked up in the sermon is that from chapter 4 onwards there's a series of Dos and Dons and churches are very big into dos and don'ts cannot do this must do this cannot do this must do that but you look at the the dos the new self as John Piper picked up it is much deeper than dos and don'ts and what God is looking for is your heart a transformed heart where you're one body you build people up the devil doesn't get in you share you you you you talk words encourage you're forgiving this is not rules now why is this important because
00:08:24 let me tell you I was close Brethren there's some people here who are 7even Day Adventist we have got quite a lot of open Brethren with us we have some ex Catholics with us we have quite a mixed batch and I'll tell you in your respective Church background there are DOs and Dons let me give you a list and it's random for example if your Hebrew Roots what you call Torah you cannot eat pork you know if you're in a certain Church you cannot even get a biometric scan in fact uh if you Google your you
00:08:58 take Google don't do it now now but after church service you Google you just Google um end of times lawsuit uh that's the word I think End of Time l so you'll get a hit you know one Christian refused to get a biometric scan in America he was actually a co- Miner right and this is only few years ago and because he refused on a religious belief the the companies sacked him they say look if every Christian refused to do this we invested millions in this he sued the company he won $600,000 US oh very good H because the church
00:09:37 told him the biometric SC is the sign of the devil it is 666 is the mark of the devil they use Revelations to pick this up I mean for example in the Church of Christ you cannot use music instruments in many traditional Evangelical churches voting Democrats how can you vote Democrats they lgbtq and their Pro Choice cannot and it goes on and goes on and here and there all right so do and those do many churches now let me give you a this if you spend time with people from any of these groups the conversation
00:10:16 always goes back to a few things which they are let me be very crude about they obsessed about you know you talk talk talk talk talk you go back to this you talk to Torah Observer you always go back to Old Testament you talk to 7day Adventist you always go back to to a s you talk to charismatic you always go back to Tong a lot of charismatic you're not going to Tar anybody here you talk to Brethren person always going back to Holy Communion must be every Sunday what it's programed and that's why we want to look
00:10:44 at the gospel let me just open this up a little bit you see when you look at all of this right what is happening is the gospel is just an entry point it's like your Visa you know and then afterward everyone goes and talk about all these things end times last Sabbath uh exposing false teaching how you get baptized Five Point Calvinism arm minisum are you pre-tribulation post-tribulation mid trip post-tribulation post trip mid tribulation forgot already they got all sorts of obsessions one now and here is the literature to it
00:11:24 when I was in a young man somebody gave me a track you know the track was about the gospel I read it oh Jesus must be your lord and savior three pages very good at the back another seven pages you know what the seven pages was you must be baptized in the holy spirit so the track is basically telling you what's more important is you must speak in tongues I'm not being offensive to any charismatics in our list but these things after a while take over the centrality of the Bible and what FBC is trying to say the center of your faith
00:12:01 is the gospel the problem is only this how does that help me when I'm depressed angry got financial problem marriage problem how does this relate is so much easier to go back to this and so we're going to take the difficult thing there today and here's the big picture unless God changes your heart through the gospel so that you truly desire to love him more more you desire to walk in the spirit obedience doesn't become a chore your faith will be a series some do and don'ts which you have been taught you
00:12:41 know earlier I used the word brainwash you know I thought somebody were ging me so I change it to thought to re you can be anything if you Brethren they'll take off the boxes that you do uh Holy Communion and do you Veil if you're charismatic do you speak in tongu if you're SDA Do You observe your sabath if Hebrew roof you eat pork or not this this this you take off the Box you're a good Christian but we are telling you and what the elders and deacons are moving it is the gospel so let me tell you how I'm going
00:13:13 to take the gospel into this text this is a very famous text we preach this to deathline FBC preach at this so I'm going to go through it a bit differently yeah I'm going to give you a bit of observation for number one when you read this very famous text about wives and husband people write books about it so many Tim K got a book on this have you noticed one thing there are more verses here about the church and Christ than they are about husbands and wives now I'm going to put you a proposition is Paul's main concern
00:13:48 husband and wives or the church in Christ I throw it to you as some scholar that picked up is church in Christ and I'll tell you why later on and I think this text has been spun too much to husbands and wife I think the anchor is Christ and the church now submission now is a dirty word nowadays today we're going to talk about H and submission so that day uh I mean we having dinner Yul and and was a table uh we both mened it and Yulan brought up this I'm not football fan so I don't know Yulan is a
00:14:20 football fan this coach are kind of goinging man those of you who don't play football he's a Spanish coach you know he coaches the female team after the one he kissed her on the lips wow now our table was very interesting he know this right there was a very Godly lady on our table so we just said the women our table say wow this are terrible you men are horrible the men on our table is like what's the big deal Heat of the Moment no big deal not very right wow the lady on the church gave us a look
00:14:58 you people are very sh histic you know then we say you we all very feministic very feminine movement so headship and submission in terms of gender roles is very sensitive now I want you to understand a bit of Paul's context because Paul's context wasn't like this Paul's context was the opposite women were very oppressed in Roman society they had no rights now to give you a bitter feel nowadays we live in this egalitarian world I'm going to take you back to 1950s Ying like to do Unforgettable ah I want to take you back
00:15:35 to your grandfather's time H noway you see this all get worked out but in the 1950s and you put a ad like that they say okay yes now in case you win I'll read you the fine print the fine print says for men only man tell her the men's World make her so happy it is W you wear a tie the lady will get down on the knees and serve you breakfast all right you think that's bad H let me show you another one in the D 50s this is normal and noway you complain a guy going and kiss a a woman on the CH what is your problem you people you can't
00:16:16 read it read it though she was a tiger lady our hero didn't have to fire a shot to flaw her after one look at his Mr legs which is his Panza she was ready to have him walk all over her wow oh y and I tell you is it always illegal to kill a woman according to this this ad it is not illegal try diplomacy Miss moresi I want you to try it blah blah blah blah help me two weeks later she has a big pink bow and a handle I give it a GI kind of cute ain't it say Miss morisy very efficient machine Mr Jones now the meal
00:16:54 is out early I get to do to go to The Girls Room in time to heal all the dir I wonder if is always illegal to kill a woman you know what he's saying number one women are stupid number two when they work they listen only they can gossip women what do you think of all of this this was your grandfather's time you know Mary getting worried Mary go take a chair throw at this already never mind I'm just getting started wow I want a man H so the ads are telling you women are subserving to men women are not very
00:17:30 intelligent and they desperate to get married and how do you get married use Colgate the stupidity of it use coate you get married that's exactly what the ad says look at last you know I'm Mighty glad liby made up her mind to marry you why did she marry you she brushed her teeth I mean how stupid is this but this is probably the worst this is completely offensive if he dis discovers you're still taking chances on getting certain type coffee W be onto you you know what ad is telling you it's right to hit a
00:18:09 woman if she doesn't give the husband the right coffee the world has changed H and you sort of ask a question you know the church nowaday is so worked up over lgbtq and pro-choice and they are right let me ask you you a question was the church worked up over all of these asss during those days they were not I need you to pick this up and you need to ask is the church complicit in suppressing women historically so when non-christians see a verse like this they get worked up wies submit yourself to your husbands as you do the Lord for
00:18:52 the husband the head of the wife as Christ the head of the church his body of which is savior now as the church submits to Christ so wi should submit to the husbands in everything here is they cringe and a lot of people have preach on this I'm not going to preach this text I'm only going to preach today on one verse one verse H and it's the verse before this is this verse submit to one another out of reverence for Christ and it's a controversial verse let me give you two interpretations and I think in the
00:19:28 end it doesn't doesn't really matter but this one many people waigh in but the first thing we must ask ourselves verse 21 in one way is connected to 22 in the Greek if you look at your Bibles right you find actually the word submit in verse 22 is in italics but verse 21 is a hater verse is a hater verse to three types of relationships where there is Authority and submission so to understand this verse is to understand it the context about Authority in marriage parenting and work that's why it's important verse let me give you how
00:20:07 we should apply this by using the gospel one how does the gospel speak to you by Authority and submission Jesus submitted to the will of the father although he didn't want to the Garden of Gethsemane says this that's submission Jesus has authority over demons that's Authority he was authority over death that's what the gospel says how does the gospel speak about Authority submission in your relationship wow my husband really a mcpo my wife I never listen to me one my children I do everything also they put a
00:20:40 wall my father never just ask me to do my boss uh don't B just do what he wants we just do we a common right where's the gospel in this and lastly is there a bigger issue to life all right right Keller work says where's your identity where are your motives and where is the way you think in all of this right let me just go straight to this all right and the context of verse 21 is this give me 10 minutes to go through bit of Theology and we go into some very important application but bear with me this next
00:21:17 part may be a bit boring the problem with verse 21 is where does it belong it either belongs to verse 22 onwards or it belongs to the earlier section that's where the controversy happens now there mainly two schools those that take 21 as the head of verse to the rest basically say this submit to one another does not mean Mutual submission uh it is the most famous col is Peter O'Brien was a head of more college John Piper and a very famous Theologian Wayne gudam Systematic Theology they wrote a book on this all
00:21:51 right this is the first interpretation it's not a majority view number one is contradictory for Paul to ask husbands and wives to mutually submit and then the next verse ask wies to submit a husband doesn't make sense they're quite correct right it's a strong argument two the Greek word for submit hippo is ever only used when there is a leader and a follower so they say submit to one another is not saying Mutual it is saying one must submit to the other and the term one another doesn't mean Mutual
00:22:25 Revelation 64 men will not slay one another this does not mean everyone mutually kills one another it's a very compelling argument it is not the majority view I'll tell you what the majority view is and it's the one that I think makes most sense especially if you read Ephesians again and again and again and this is the second one it means Mutual number one mutual submission does not do with authoritative structures and this a very powerful argument because Jesus washed the feet of his disciples it doesn't mean he's not
00:22:58 leader but he lowers himself to a slave to wash the feet of disciples and you know the context of Matthew in Luke it tells you the disciples are fighting who be number one so there's this issue about who wants to be number one he telling you want be number one you lower yourself it's a powerful argument number two is just a straight reading but here context tells you verse 21 coming from verse 19 all right 1718 same thing Holy Spirit I will show you the verses the larger context says the same thing and slaves and Masters
00:23:35 says the same thing and Ephesians is really about that this is all bit theological let me give you the verses Ephesians 4:12 is what bearing with one another 31 to 32 is what kind and compassionate to one another forgive one another verse 19 is speaking to one another so common sense Summit to one another is mutual the flow makes sense that's one now here's the other thing which is interesting in the second context which is when you talk about slaves and Masters I hear this slaves of your Earthly Master olden days slaves
00:24:11 were very common they were not like doing American days where it's Africans you know with respect and fear all right quite interesting H with sincerity your heart as you obey Christ serve wholeheartedly now the killer verse is verse 9 Masters treat your slaves in the same way meaning respect and fear them sincerity of heart and serve them and the context of this comes on Ephesians 51 walk in the way of love now there's a very similar reading of this in Galatians serve one another the love love your neighbor which is your slave
00:24:45 and what is it walk by the spirit that's walking love so I put it to you the evidence is very strong is mutual okay this the theology uh those of you who fell asleep can wake up now h now here's the key thing Ephesians 2 tells us he's reconciling everybody male female Master Slave husband wives through the cross so let me give you a bit of this and let's take it to some real everyday practical things what does it mean then to submit and this is where semantics and I think those who take the first view won't object to this one is
00:25:24 coming from Philippians therefore if any encouragement being United with Christ that's the context of Ephesians 4 onwards are bear with one another make every effort to become United all right comfort from his love common sharing tenderness make my joy complete being likeminded Same Love One in spirit that is Ephesians 2 you Jews and Gentiles are coair together co- partakers and here is the verse one for all of us H do nothing out of selfish ambition and the Greek rendering of selfish ambition means that
00:26:01 in any relationship whether it's husband and wife parents and children boss and staff Church elders and followers ah you want to be getting your way ah this is getting more real number two vain conit this is very powerful and then he says something picking up from Jesus washing the feet right rather in humility value others than yourself that's an echo of Jesus washing the feet of his disciples not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interest of the others and why this is the gospel centeredness this
00:26:45 is why we wrap this around the gospel in your relationships with one another friend to friend husband to wife boss to staff parents to children everybody in your relationship with one another have the same mindset as Christ Jesus who being the very nature God did not consider equal where we all do it to be used to the advantage right because that's what we like to do and here's the lowering rather he made himself nothing taking the very nature of servant being made in human likeness the gospel is telling us
00:27:23 in our relationship you lower yourself to the other person and being found in appearance as man he humbled himself becoming obedient to death even death on the cross therefore God exalted him to the highest Place gave him the name that above every name and the name of Jesus that's Authority every knee shall bow in Heaven and Earth under the Earth that's submission here and there's Authority here so let me wrap it up and we go to application how the gospel teaches us to submit to each other one you give away
00:27:54 your rights your privileges your ways of doing things can you imagine husband and wife at home husband wants to watch Netflix know oh y he want to watch this you know wife want to watch Korean drama on Netflix husband say I'm husband I hate I take the thing wife say as usually you bully me correct or not but can you imagine oh wife you you know like they fight over the bill marriage will be so good huh one two think of s less and others more that's really what humility is humility isn't about y I'm very lousy I'm very lower
00:28:35 I'm very chakay I got no that's not it h when Jesus lowered himself he's King of Kings as the text Philippians says you think of others more and of course Galatians serve one another and here's the one you align ourselves under the other person but perceiving ourselves as lesson rank for the benefit of the other now this I think is the key point let me put it up for you and I'm only giving you two points today yeah one unless your willing to submit to each other you will have issues entering into
00:29:11 relationship where you're either a leader or follower it has taking me years to pick this up this is lifechanging it is so lifechanging you know why because it is every day we do this and this is how you do it wives align themselves under husband the way a CH to Christ you see you when the moment you take away the word align yourselves it becomes dos and don'ts you know it becomes law but when the moment you say wives humble themselves the same way the husband humbles himself the children humble the the parents fathers humble
00:29:46 themselves slaves humble you find the tone is completely different when two people in an authority and submission relationship start to say you know what I'm going to hum hum myself think of you more perceive myself lower in rank the entire Dynamics change this is lifechanging let me give you a picture of four hierarchy relationships one your mate at home two husband and wife quarreling three office where you're telling your stuff what to do and parenting or Sunday school all of us do this right you go on
00:30:25 autopilot when you do this but the moment I put this picture there it changes the equation you know uh that day I met I told you this I met my ex Sunday School student I used to be Sunday school teacher ah she now big really 30 years already I Tau him in 203 so we met with some of the elders here we having dinner he had a good long talk I chatted with him know we shared I shared where all he was and then he paused he look at me you know you know when you were teaching me Sunday school I was going ah this is
00:31:03 time for compliment normally when they say that they say you know when you're teaching me Sunday school I'm thankful you gave me all the foundations that here is where I am today Hallelujah correct right you know he said you know when you taught me Sunday school even then I could tell her you're very arrogant you know then he said I think you have changed you know I go back he beat you oh he remember that you arrogant but this is very real you need to pick this up because that's what the crosses that's God lowering himself for
00:31:46 us and let me add this uh to really understand the text of husband and wives parents and children slaves and Masters you need to pick it up chapter 4 and a lot of us don't do this you can't do any of this you cannot enter into a relationship okay I'm going to give you a case study yeah okay before that H okay what the word teachers say there's only one speed mind catch up or Dropout follower I can't catch up so I'll drop off what does the bible teach you the leader says one speed but for your sake
00:32:21 I will slow down I slow down now what does the follower say oh very good the follower says for your sake I will speed up that is mutual submission let me see where we go with this okay this actually happened at church imagine this Hall is packed pack okay H nobody I introduce the speaker after that nowhere to sit you know what should I do imagine like all empty nobody like to see in front very scared of their Elders on but imagine the place is packed it happened under church now what do you do scenario one
00:32:57 hey Mary you leave I see Mar I'm Elder my right Elder although my name not written on the chair I got privileges correct one now two go and sit on the floor then they say w s on the floor now both options it's not what the text is saying I tell you what the text is saying and this actually happened the elders sat on the floor and the church member says you come and see my chair I have a go in the floor it's the same thing but fight over the bill again you follow the context that serving one another and the
00:33:48 church member who told me this I know the pastor he studied with me in unsw to give you a face all right he was a doctor who became a pastor some of you know him he went on to take a very large Church in K and the church member told me this you should see her eyes she said if the leader does this we follow this is very powerful and I'll give you a few case studies as we go on what the world teaches you boss my way just do say stop I got quit don't need to put up with all this beep that only one way you know Chinese
00:34:27 parenting is you just do what I say son I cannot tah I go overse studies I don't need to put up with this beep you you follow the pattern and here's the worst pattern when husband say the hit the household and I've seen Christi husband say that she must submit why in the moment I'll get a divorce this is the way of the world I want you to pause on this and there's one particular area I want to pick up now in scale marriage because divorce involved people hang on the same principle parenting harder Al not so
00:35:13 hard also hang on work also but not as hard there a scaler the easiest for you to jettison everything and I was one area I didn't pick up actually is church because there's no Financial investment there's nothing in church this is the highest attrition rate I cannot T you I don't work with you Church big enough you walk here I walk the other side I form my own gang because you don't listen my you Elders all like that one this one a troublemaker now here's the context which we don't realize you know if you
00:35:47 look carefully at the chapter and you Flow Away from chapter one that's why I ask you just now is the text saying more about husband wives or the church and I put it to you is the church because it flows from chapter one chapter 1 2 3 4 5 is all about the church Christ and the gospel so let me ask you some painful questions ah ah is anim a good Elder H cannot hear is ye there the good Elder take a PO now here what serving one another say except you sit out there I cannot tell you but you are very
00:36:36 whatever serving one another me we don't only ask that question we we don't only take that poll you didn't say take a poll we also take a poll of this are you a good follower correct or not that's what serving that means you have no right to say hey this fellow really lousy leader without asking the question are you a good follower I have no right to say this fellow Troublemaker always cause issue without saying am I a good leader that's what serving one another means that's how lowering yourself is I'll give you a few
00:37:11 examples of this so here's the question if I'm a bad leader it affects you you know and there's one question to ask you if I'm a bad leader should you still listen to me how come no everyone very quiet ask again H if I'm a bad leader but I did not break scripture I did not steal money I did not have sexual immorality I didn't teach false things I you just cannot tahan me I don't listen to you I buos I do things without system I'm insensitive but if I tell you to do something should you listen to me
00:37:59 very divided H if God gave us unconditional love I'll take this next week I have to give unconditional love to you even though say some of you I'm not no one does that drives me up the wall huh God gave unconditional love you have to unconditionally respect your leaders you hear that you may hate me you know but you must submit W painful H next week we'll talk about this love and respect because they are a pair so let us do this Ephesians says this if you bite and devour each other watch out you will be destroyed by
00:38:48 each other this is my part two to my Unity sermon long time brewing and it is my prayer as a church we do not devour each one another let me give you three three ways where we can do this one we must not be dominating all right but two members can assert by manipulation now this happens especially not just in churches it happens a lot in marriages you know when you have a cat what do you do when you want the cat to do you want the cat to do what you want do you whack the cat you whack the cat what does a cat do
00:39:28 you go and stroke the cat the cat will come to you that's why women are spared at bed that's why they say R around the finger so you can manipulate so these few things that I pick up from my own heart now two leaders are very lousy at respecting protocol I have done this you come out here tell you you need to do this everybody hey how come nobody you didn't tell me one very insensitive so we need to listen more church members you must have Grace because we are busy people and maybe my favorite is
00:40:01 this the favorite comment they have about Elders is they do not listen to you you ask the Elder there the Elder says I listened they just don't listen to what I say you follow me or not so this is the process and we do this by serving one another so I just want us to maybe massage this as we do this here's the second point and this is a very very important point and then we'll close and this on the heart learning to submit one one another is never always reciprocal a years ago uh we had somebody who came to Alpha I
00:40:42 love the brother after he listened he said I'm going to go back and be a good husband he went back and he got a good husband now he tried to be better the wife told him to get lost you see here's the thing then he got upset Tom me I came I went through Alpha I I did all you asked me to do how come she didn't reciprocate the danger of a sermon like this is that it takes a human level no I serve you serve I humble you humble everything gets better hey you're not you're in what Disneyland the real world
00:41:17 doesn't work like that that's why unconditional love unconditional respect is centered to scripture and centered to the Cross you do it it does doesn't mean you get it reciprocated let me give you a story on this all right you can do all of this the other person might not reciprocate and then you sayal how to do how to how to go through it's very difficult you try to be humble you try to be understanding you try to be listening your husband doesn't listen to you you try to be a good staff go extra way do it your boss
00:41:50 is still a you try to listen to your kid try because you don't want him to build a wall the fellow say I don't want to talk to you you go and play game in the room you follow us this is a very real issue let me give you a story The Key of the verse is the second part submit to one another not because you get the results you want but out of reverence for Christ and that flows right through to the three structures especially boss and staff or slaves and Masters and this ties back to the two prayers of Paul and
00:42:26 the story they really picked this up is Leah because here is a woman who tried to give the husband what he wanted and let's see what happened and most of you know the story let me recap it for you she was the wife that was unloved and like most women she just wanted to be loved we'll pick this up next week let me give you a teaser I'll give you a teaser women want to be loved men want to be respected you you think about it and I'll show you how Ephesian says it and how first Peter 3 says that also when the Lord saw that Leah was not
00:43:08 L he enabled her to conceive but Rachel remained childless Leah is the unloved wife of Jacob for those who may not know the story and they two wives Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son she named him Ruben she say is because the Lord has seen much misery and here's the part I want you to underline surely my my husband will love me now if I do this my husband will love me if I lower myself I learn to listen more I learn to be more empathetic I learn to be more quieter I learn to be more patient I learn to be more forgiving
00:43:43 he'll be a better husband to me didn't happen second round she conceived again and when she gave birth to son she said because the Lord heard I'm not Lov he gave me this one too and she named me Simeon if I do this my husband will Hear My Cries the world is full of many women in marriages where they are lonely where they say the husbands are too busy at work too busy at things too busy providing family and they don't spend enough attention with their wives and we'll pick this up more next week and then third round again she
00:44:25 conceived she gave birth to Ser now at last my husband will become attached to me here the hope now at last because I born him three sons Chinese culture sure pakal already correct or not here the hope you know I want you to feel her now at last I born in three sons and what does every woman in a marriage one Every Woman they want their husbands to be attached to them can you feel this Can you feel it does Jacob love Leah he doesn't she does all of this and he doesn't and so this chapter ends this
00:45:21 way she conceive again and when she gave bir the St this time she doesn't say about a husband she say this time I will praise the Lord so she named in Judah and then the text is interesting then she stopped having children what is the text telling you my husband doesn't love me despite everything I do but God loves me everything I said today you can go back and try and you may not get the results you want you may and what happens when it doesn't you anchor yourself to the gospel because God so loved you he gave his one and
00:46:10 only begotten son that you will not perish but have eternal life that's what will keep you through when things go bad in a marriage in parenting in the office and in church now I'm going to give you a little teaser for part two next week yeah a lot of preachers stop here and they say hallelujah they forget that chapter 30 you know you see for Leah her identity as a woman is what I must be loved by my husband what the gospel is telling you I'm loved by God I am a child of God my identity is not as a husband or a wife
00:46:58 I'm not successful because I can bear children I am not successful because I got I'm respected at my work we'll do that next week men have a lot of that problem I'm not I'm not successful because my children are close to me but these are things we all identify ourselves with and when we are not close to our kids we have a bad marriage your job is no good you feel like you're a failure and the gospel anchors you through this and why Chapter 30 is interesting for Leah her identity is she must be loved by Jacob what is Rous
00:47:35 identity in she's Love by Jacob ma let me give you one verse and we go through next week when Rachel saw she was not bearing Jacob any she became jealous of her sister she said to Jacob give me children or I die you know what her identity is Mother you see where we going with this that's what the devil does to you and so Paul reminds us in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us for I'm convinced neither death nor life nor a lousy marriage a lousy job Elders I cannot
00:48:26 tahan neither Angels or Neons neither the present or future neither height nor dep or anything or creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is Christ Jesus I'm going to ask the worship team to come up and I pray this morning we serve one another in the church in your marriage in your parenting in your office and I pray you get the results you want but if you don't May the be a verse they'll take you through those dark nights let us pray Lord God we come before you now to say let us make the cross the
00:49:19 center of our relationships can we have some keys and L we just want to say very often it is very hard for us to submit to one another because we are proud We want to do things our way and right now as the as we prepare to minister and sing to one another in love I want you to let the gospel sort of audit your heart are you the type of person that is combative are you the type of person that wants things your way are you the type of person person who where are you are you a good leader are you a good follower because we very
00:50:03 often both and I want you to just look at Jesus who being in the very nature God did not consider equality something to be grasp with something to be used to Advantage but lowered himself taking on the form of a slave of a servant for you and I and I want you to pause and ask yourself how does that image of Jesus king of kings lowering himself to be a servant washing the feet of his disciples dying on the cross for our sck I want you to sit on that image and ask yourself am I a good husband am I a good
00:50:49 wife am I a good father am I a good mother am I a good boss am I a good staff am I I anim a good Elder are you good members of abbc I want you to take a moment to let that sinking and after a while the worship team will lead us and we will sing to one [Music] another church May invite you to rise as we prepare the sing the response [Music] song after today's message may be reminder for us to realign our purposes our lives and ultimately our identity to be centered on Jesus and on him alone only let us
00:51:47 sing Jesus at the center of it all Jesus said CER of from beginning to the end it will always be it's always been you Jesus Jesus Jesus at the center Jesus at the center of the [Music] all Jesus said C of it all from beginning to the end it will always be it's always been you Jesus Jesus Nothing Else Matters nothing in this world will do Jesus you're the center everything revolves around you Jesus you Jesus be the center of my life Jesus be the center of life from beginning to the end it will always be it's always been
00:53:37 you Jesus Jesus Nothing Else [Music] Matters nothing in this world will and Jesus you're the center and every fall around you Jesus you nothing else matters nothing in this world will do Jesus your the center everythings around you Jesus you we can we be seated we're going to let the Lord minister to us I told you a story of an unhappy marriage I'm going to tell you now of a happy marriage and we end this way and this a true story so there was this lady who was happily married real story yeah and then after 42 years of
00:55:06 marriage the husband passed away now every year at the wedding anniversary he will give her flowers so at a funeral she said this has come to an end he has gone home to the Lord the first year when the husband passed away she received flowers and the card said from your husband eternally yours she got so angry you know went to the florish shop and say hey my husband passed away this is a very crude joke and then the florry said no it's not the husband before he died deposited a very large amount of
00:56:09 money with the florist and told the florist for the as long as my wife lives you will deliver flowers on our wedding anniversary I than you I heard that story cry baby it brings a tear to me what did the husband do the husband looked past his pain he served his wife by saying I now going home to the Lord how would my wife go on and every year he has been sending flowers and he essentially is saying this even beyond the grave I will love you I want you to hear that even beyond the grave I will love
00:57:20 you that's serving one another that's looking past your pain looking towards the need of another person and thinking what would bring the other person through difficult days as you close right now I want you to think of someone close to you your wife your husband your children and I want you to pause as we close and ask yourself have you really taught what they need have you really listen or has your love be tainted by your own needs that story really encouraged me because that is Christ edifying self humbling serving One
00:58:15 Another Love let us pray as we just close Lord we it's so hard to submit to one another our loves are selfish teach us to Humble ourselves lower ourselves serve one another oh Lord as you oh lord gave up yourself for us teach us to do that and on one day on the other side of Eternity may we all see each other as a body of Christ United in one mind and in one love and in God's people say amen let's just close with the chorus again may I invite you to Rise Church as we continue with this [Music] song Let us sing from my heart to the
00:59:15 heavens Jesus be the center it's all about you yes it's all about you from my heart to the heavens Jesus be the center it's all about you yes it's all about you from my heart to the heavens Jesus be the center it's all about you yes it's all about you from my heart to the heavens Jesus be the center it's all about you yes it's all about [Music] you Jesus be the center of your church and Jesus be the center of your church and every knee Willow and every Tong shall confess you Jesus Jesus Jesus Jesus
01:00:54 Jesus Jesus [Music] Jesus Jesus Nothing Else Matters nothing in this world will [Music] do Jesus Center everything re around you nothing else matter nothing in this world will do Jesus [Music] you're every gos around you Jesus let us repeat this Jesus at the center of it all Jesus the center of it [Music] all beginning to the end it will always be it's always be in you [Laughter] Jesus [Music] Jesus Lord as we close in prayer may you be at the center of this church May the cross be front and center
01:02:45 not just in words but in the demonstration of the power the power Your Love May the demonstration of the power Your Love be at the center of our marriage marriages Center of us as parents Center of us as children to our parents Center of us as workers reporting to our bosses Center to us as Leaders to staff below us Jesus may you be at the center now receive the benediction May the power of the Cross give you the humil the ability to lower yourself before someone else the willingness to think ofself less and think of others
01:03:37 more and the ability to cling to the Cross when it is not reciprocated take you through your work tomorrow your family life tomorrow your marriage tomorrow your time with your children tomorrow and for the rest of the week till we meet again next Sunday God bless you all service is over please exit in a quiet Manner and again please stay back let us talk and get to know one and another better and if you any prayer requests we are here God bless you all
